Funny Christmas Quotes: There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right? —Conan O’Brien
Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.
2. Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.
3. Christmas is a time when you get homesick, even when you’re home.
4. I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, ‘Toys not included.’
5. I hate the radio this time of year because they play ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You‘ like, every other song. And that’s just not enough.
6. Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa?
7. There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. So, guys, that means 16 more days till we start shopping, right?
8. A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
9. The one thing women don’t want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.
10. Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.
11. This holiday season, no matter what your religion is, please take a moment to reflect on why it’s better than all the other ones.
—Guy Endore Kaiser
12. What I like about Christmas is that you can make people forget the past with the present.
13. I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.
14. The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.